Feb 22, 2010

Strange transactions

Are relationships a business deal which lasts just as long as both sides are satisfied, emotionally or physically as the case may be?It saddens me to question this but will our generation ever be able to find stable spouses for life? Or will we just pre-plan marriages with our best friend or our first extra-marital affairs with the hottest friend that we have who is presently dating someone else and hence, he/she is out of your reach? Should a girl discontinue watching movies like 'A Walk To Remember' or 'Serendipity' just to adjust to the fact that there is no Prince Charming, there is no concept of a one-woman man and hence, snap back to the reality of the times? I would not like to pass this off as a hasty generalisation, but in general, the following are the reality of the times:
  1. Most teenagers have committment issues and don't know how to deal with it!
  2. People have had flings with/been in relationships with too many people by the age of 21 and it's a case of 'Been there, done that'. The boredom caused due to this makes the next one just a temporary arrangement between the two concerned individuals.
  3. The line of demarcation between lust and love is fading. Earlier, people would say that lust is physical while love is emotional. Untrue in today's context! The physical and emotional aspect need to co-exist, which is a seemingly impossible task considering the raging hormones of teenagers today.
  4. Love at first sight does not exist. It was a sweet concept while growing up, as was the concept of the man of your dreams coming on a black horse and kneeling down and asking your hand for marriage. The fact: these are concepts. NOT reality. The faster you face it, the easier it is to sleep and not have silly dreams about it!
  5. Hot vampires like Edward Cullen do not exist. But if someone does know of their existence(Mind you, I'm looking for both hot AND a blood-sucking vampire),let me know!
  6. Saying "I love you" is not such a big deal anymore. Apparently. I'm sure I'd still find it special if said to me by someone I like...Can't generalise on this one, though.
  7. Money may not be involved but sex can be a negotiatable deal.
  8. You can't always 'Blame it on the alcohol' as Jamie Foxx thinks.
  9. Condoms are still approved of! Please continue using them!
  10. Despite the fact that I've written this post, I still believe in love and I am waiting for it to come around at the right time with the right guy. Call me pretentious but it's just that though I know the facts, it's okay to hope that the times can be changed and 'love', whatever it may be, exists.


Naman Saraiya said...

Don't fret.
It's thoughtful, but it'll be fine. Love will resurface, and so will trust.

Jolene said...

See, I agree that there are a lot of really screwed up people around; but then there are other's who're not, and who will commit when the right man comes along.

Another thing is, some relationships you grow out of. Like, you connect with the person at one point in your life, but then you grow either too fast or too much slower in comparison to the other. And love dies, maybe for one, or both. The the other has to adjust. And life goes on . . . :)

Mayank Susngi said...

There are stil one "women" men who can differentiate between love n lust...trust me :-)

kittu said...

wow wow wow
caalm down rho!!! First of all there still r men who r waiting for that one woman. and yes there is some truth in the facts that u hav stated BUT
1 - love at first sight totally exists
2 - Saying "I Love You" - will be very special or very ordinary depending on the person saying it and how u feel towards that person. For example, if edward said i love u - ull love it alot more and how that person expresses his love is the most important thing.
and finally, im happy that u r "pretentious" and im sure love will enter ur life soon if it hasnt already

Anonymous said...

love at first sight exists if you believe in skin deep beauty. though for most, including me, next step comes only if the other person is pretty decent to look at. for me, the conversation matter more, hence love at first is out of the question. though interest at first might be there. ;)

the importance of i love you exists. i hadn't said that for more than 7 months to my ex until i was sure she was the one.

rest is sadly true.

(¯`•._.•[Raaji]•._.•´¯) said...

yes, things change as society changes but love stays... its human nature... we are all bound to fall in love at one point :-)

Akanksha Arya said...

Love exists. And its complicated. But the fact that id does cannot be mistaken.

And all of this, I have seen it around this city. Of half the people I know in places like Delhi and Mumbai, the love thing you so dearly are referring to remains.

About the right guy, just a word of advice : You are around 20 years of age. Give it some time. Similarly give people around you some time. Not many can be called emotionally mature.


Dev B said...

like u had said to me one time....i ll repeat the advice for u....
wait awhile..be patient...
i agree thr r those ppl who cant differentiate between love n lust bt then thr r the oddballs who can...
it mite take a lil long but u ll find them...if nt nw maybe later...
love does exist!
it mite jus take awhile fr u to recognize it!!! :)

Peter said...

homes, I feel most of these interactions are true( how they play out) and very common. I think an end goal is to realize this desensitization from experiences of saying I love you all the time and to much sex n things of the sort, realize you want somthing more, and then one begins to put meaning to these acts and words, which in turn leads to a new (somtimes less frequent) use of these things. Finding what interaction and actions mean for yourself and how to appropriatley give... hmmmm
I sorta ranted and didn't check back, hope it makes some sense or one can get somthing from this response or feel meh on some level

I like your quest ( and medium) Life questions and posing them to the world and we can all discuss them. cool

Anonymous said...

I've found modern relationships best summed up by this quote (Alvy Singer, Annie Hall):

"Yeah, why not, because we're just gonna go home later, right, and then there's gonna be all that tension, we've never kissed before and I'll never know when to make the right move or anything. So we'll kiss now and get it over with, and then we'll go eat. We'll digest our food better."

Rana Sinha said...

Nice post. Why only teenagers, adults of every age group have commitment issues.

Love at first sight often means lust at first sight. Love grows out of acceptance and maturity. It'll come when you least expect it, like a thief in the night. Would you recognize genuine love?

Cave Man said...

But you crave for ''Byronic- Peter Pans'', cutie. Don't you?

Caveman's stone 118# reads : People in love are more infatuated with the idea of love than the person and this delusion usualy thrown them in to the dungeon of blindness about the person.

Prelude to love:

Usually, in love, person turns blind to the uglyness of the partner only to hate the same thing when fall out of love.

Falling out of love is more intriguing than falling in though.

Anonymous said...

i still believe love at first sight can happen.

and sometimes, you can blame it on the alcohol.

maybe, your prince charming is there somewhere. just dont give up hope.

kaleketu said...

Trully sayin Love at 1st sight exist....
Saying "I love you" is not such a big deal bt to start sayin I lyk u is better option to think abt sum1....
Hey gal...Love Exists..n u'll find d true love fr u ..dont give up..!!!

sanaya said...

Interesting. What's interesting is that the points you have listed are all common sense- we KNOW this stuff intuitively, but it takes someone like you to actually sit down and list them out =D

I'm not too sure about the part pertaining to teenagers though...I know committed teens who are "in love". The thing I am sure about though is love at later stages in life-when you've been married for decades. I think its inevitable that people fall out of love, and in this age and society, people are increasingly turning to walking out of loveless marriages or having an affair on the side. Its become socially acceptable now. The concept of "till death do us part" is sadly dead.